![]() ![]() ![]() Perhaps they’ve been living with their parents ever since high school, and now as adults, they control the house. I know that many parents out there have kids who never launch. Kids Who Fail to LaunchĮver hear yourself repeatedly make excuses like, “He’s a good kid, he’s just a little lost right now ” or “He’s going through a hard time-if I don’t help him who will?” The truth is, when your kid can’t launch, you are enabling him. This resentment only adds to the stress of living together. What happens when there isn’t a plan? Frustration and resentment build when you hear your child says things like, “I’m looking for a job, but I can’t find anything,” but you’ve seen him sleeping late every day and staying out partying at night. (I’ll talk more about how to make a concrete plan in Part 2 of this article series.) We’re going to help you, but the plan is for you to get on your feet.” Having a plan is important because it will ensure that your child’s stay back home doesn’t drag on forever. The message can be, “You’re not here for good. What I recommend is to have a plan of action with your child. Related content: Adult Child Living at Home Driving You Crazy? The good news is that it’s in your control to change this situation. Just know that when you over–function you’re allowing the negative behaviors to continue. Helping your older child means doing something for him he can’t do himself, such as driving him somewhere when he has a broken leg. ![]() There’s an important difference between helping and over–functioning. What is over-functioning? Over–functioning means you’re taking responsibility for things he can do for himself, like doing his laundry and cleaning up his messes after he’s had friends over. When this happens, many times it’s because the parents have been over-functioning for their kids. Developmentally, they’re just not ready to take care of themselves, so they end up at home. Some adult children are slower to mature than others. ![]()
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